What is Roll Tide?

“Roll Tide is Alabama’s battle cry, but among fans, it’s the ultimate all-purpose phrase, like prego in Italian or namaste in Nepali, an acceptable substitute for hello, goodbye, nice to meet you, and Amen” — Warren St. John, Rammer Jammer Yellowhammer

The Bear said ...

If you want to walk the heavenly streets of gold, you gotta know the password, "Roll, Tide, Roll!"

Currently browsing: Roll Tide

Who’s going to A-Day?

With the job-hunting-related hurricane flurrying around me, I’ve almost forgotten about this upcoming weekend: A-Day game!!!!

Jess and I have made this a yearly tradition and plan on meeting up with some friends and loved ones this Saturday in T’town. Also, I was just reading an announcement on The Birmingham News site that there will be a 7-on-7 game prior to kickoff featuring former Crimson Tide players and coaches. Sweet!

A little FYI: Gates typically open around 11, and the article says the flag football game is set for noon. (Get there EARLY!!) The A-Day game itself kicks off around 2. If you need parking information, traffic routes, maps, etc. I encourage you to visit the Alabama Game Day website.

Oh, and bring sunscreen … if you’re even half as white as me, you’ll need it!

ROLL TIDE ROLL!

Humpday Hilarities

Courtesy of my Cotillion sister, Beth C:

Posted to Craig’s List Personals:

To the Guy Who Mugged Me Downtown (Downtown, Birmingham )

Date: 2009-01-06, 3:43AM EST

I was the white guy with the brown Burberry leather jacket that you demanded I hand over shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend. You also asked for my girlfriend’s purse and earrings. I hope you somehow come across this message. I’d like to apologize.

I didn’t expect you to crap your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. Truth is, I was wearing the jacket for a reason that evening, because it wasn’t that cold outside. You see, my girlfriend had just bought me that COLT 1911 .45 ACP pistol for Christmas, and we had just picked up a shoulder holster for it that evening. Beautiful pistol, eh? It’s a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head, isn’t it?

I know it probably wasn’t a great deal of fun walking back to wherever you’d come from with that brown sludge flopping about in your jockey shorts. I’m sure it was even worse since you also ended up leaving your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. I couldn’t have you calling up any of your buddies to come help you try to mug us again. I took the liberty of calling your mother, or “Momma” as you had her listed in your cell, and explaining to her your situation. I also bought myself some gas on your card. I gave your shoes to one of the homeless guys over by Vinnie Van Go Go’s, along with all of the cash in your wallet, then I threw the wallet itself in a dumpster.

I also called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell. They’ll be on your bill in case you’d like to know which ones. SoBell recently shut down the line, and I’ve only had the phone for a little over a day now, so I don’t know what’s going on with that. I hope they haven’t permanently cut off your service. I was about to make some threatening phone calls to the DA’s office with it. Oh well.

So, about your pants. I know that I was a little rough on you when you did this whole attempted mugging thing, so I’d like to make it up to you. I’m sure you’ve already washed your jockey shorts and your pants, so I’d like to help you out. I’d like to reimburse you for the detergent you used on the pants. What brand did you use, and was it liquid or powder? I’d also like to apologize for not killing you and instead making you walk back home humiliated. I’m hoping that you’ll reconsider your choice of path in life. Next time you might not be so lucky. If you read this message, email me and we’ll do lunch and laundry. Peace!

– Alex

And this one is courtesy of Scott Allan:

Alabama Judge gives 7 year old right to decide custody.

Birmingham , Al, December 31, 2008

A seven year old boy was at the center of a county courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy had a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulation requiring that family unity be maintained to the highest degree possible.

The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried and said that they also beat him. After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him.

After two recesses to check legal references and confer with the child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the Auburn University Football Team, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.

Roll Tide!!!

It’s busy time!

Jessie’s been sick and I’ve been slammed at work, so just saying that I’ve been “busy” is an overstatement. ;P

The game this past weekend was a disappointment, but while wallowing I realized that honestly Bama DID have a good season this year. In fact, just saying they were “good” doesn’t do them justice — this season was awesome. Hell, they were Number freakin’ 1 for Pete’s sake! We kicked a lot tail and shut up a lot of nay-sayers.

That, my friends, is a good thing.

So yeah, I was a little sad coming in yesterday morning. I’ve looked forward to making wallpapers every Monday following a Tide win. Who knows … perhaps I’ll get to make another in a few weeks!

Things at work have been crazy. Usually, things are slowing down this time of year, but with the recent merger, we’ve taken on a huge workload and unfortunately cannot slow down. I have had some time to work on porting one of my designs to SharePoint though.

Hooray for creative time!

It’s a bit minimalistic, but I’m hoping to use it on a soon-to-be-public site that desperately needs a facelift.

I’ve also been working on a side project involving some heavy-duty Blogger hacks, so once I’m done I’ll be posting them on here as well. (note: using the newer Blogger beta XML coding, not the “classic” templates) Basically someone has a Blogger site and did not want it to “look like a blog.”

I had to really thump hard on the ole noggin for that one, but I’m pretty pleased with how it’s turning out. A lot of the mods I’m using either aren’t well documented, or were very hard to find, so I’m hoping that sharing them on here will help others. (or, at least, that’s my intent anyway!)

I’ve also made a few modifications to this site and have it all Christmas-sied up. I still haven’t decorated my house yet though. With Jessie being sick, I didn’t think it fair to do anything without her, so I’m looking forward to spending some time with her this weekend and do a little holiday decorating.

I hope everyone is having a great holiday season so far!

Tide, get ready to ROLL!

H/T: Beth C

ROLL TIDE ROLL!

Iron Bowl 2008 Wallpaper

Here’s this week’s wallpaper:

Click image to preview

Download: 1024×768 / 1152×864 / 1280×1024

So how about that Tide? I have to admit, that was one of the most enjoyable games!!

ROLL TIDE ROLL!

The Tide rolls over Auburn 36-0

Rammer Jammer Yellowhammer, you gave them Hell, Alabama!

I have to admit, I’m enjoying every minute of this madness. Outside of a few missed calls and lousy announcers (CBS, you SUCK!), I have hollered and screamed my happy little heart out and am sitting here elated. The last time Alabama shut out Auburn was during the 1992 season.

*enter: Twilight Zone theme*

You GO, Tide! Be happy and celebrate your sweet little hearts out tonight. You’ve earned it. But come Monday, it’s back to the field and time to keep your eyes on the prize. Florida is going to give us a run for our money next weekend!

A lucky woman am I

I’ve enjoyed connecting with family and friends. I ate my fill of turkey, dressing, ham, a wide assortment of sweetened vegetable casseroles and colorful salads, and let’s not forget — my mother’s delicious Southern pecan pie. I watched my daughter play football with my father, then my husband, then I took a turn.

My God, she’s got a cannon for an arm! If she learns a little control, she’d make a decent QB. Look out, Bama, I’ve got one coming your way in a few years!

We’re sitting around listening to some Loreena McKennitt, anticipating the oncoming turkey-induced coma that follows such feasts as we’ve had today. My husband has been sitting here trying to talk me back into singing — and with everything I have going on, I admit that I have missed it. (Performing is another matter, but singing I love…)

I told Jim I’d think about it … and I am …

But in the meantime I’m happy sitting here enjoying the warmth and I’m thinking to myself, what a lucky woman I am. I hope everyone is having a great holiday.

Love and blessings to you all!

Humpday Hilarities: Bama Edition

Yup, another ‘Awbarn’ joke this morning! This one is courtesy of the Times Daily forums.

An Auburn city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old farmer livin’ outside Tuscaloosa. The farmer’s prize bull was missing from the section through which the railroad passed. The farmer only wanted to be paid the fair value of the bull. The case was scheduled to be tried before the justice of the peace. The attorney for the railroad immediately cornered the farmer and tried to get him to settle out of court. The lawyer did his best selling job, and finally the farmer agreed to take half of what he was asking.

After the farmer had signed the release and took the check, the Auburn lawyer couldn’t resist gloating a little over his success, telling the farmer, “You know, I hate to tell you this, old man, but I put one over on you in there. I couldn’t have won the case. The engineer was asleep and the fireman was in the caboose when the train went through your ranch that morning. I didn’t have one witness to put on the stand. I bluffed you!”

The old farmer replied, “Well, I’ll tell you, young feller, I was a little worried about winning that case myself, because that durned bull came home this morning.”

Iron Bowl week continues …

These are courtesy of the Tide Fans forums:

A recruit from Birmingham, a highly prized 5-star long snapper, was driving down to Auburn for his final visit. He had made the decision that the loveliest village on the plains would be his school. As he merged onto Hwy 15, he saw a sign that read, “Auburn University – Left.”

Disappointed, he turned around and went back home.

Alabama Power hired 3 Auburn players and 3 Alabama players to put up pole for the summer. The supervisor for both crews took them out and assigned the Auburn crew to put pole down one street and the Bama player down another.

At the end of the day both crews come back in to the shop and the supervisor asked the Bama crew, “how many poles did you guys plant today?” One of the players responded, “15.” The supervisor replied, “pretty good first day. Try to improve tomorrow.”

The supervisor then asked the Auburn crew, “how many poles did you guys plant today?” One of the players responded, “3.” The supervisor replied,”In eight hours you only planted 3 poles. I know this was your first day on the job but the Bama guys planted 15. What gives?” One of the Auburn players protested, “But boss, you should see how shallow they buried theirs!”

A man sitting on a bench in downtown Auburn noticed as two Auburn students in a “City of Auburn – Public Works” truck drove up and parked.

The students walked over by a long sidewalk where one proceeded to dig a hole with a shovel. As soon as he finished digging the other student took his shovel and proceeded to fill the hole back up with the dirt that had been dug out.

The man continued to watch. This went on until about fifty carefully spaced holes were dug and filled back in.

The man finally could stand it no longer. He walked over and said, “Guys, I admire your work ethic, you’ve been busting your tails big time. But why is one of you digging a hole and the other one filling it back up”?

The first student looked at the man and answered, “Well normally we’re a three man crew…but the student who plants the trees took the day off”.

ROLL TIDE!

Google knows football

I sniped this one from the Times Daily forums:

Click the image to view full size.

ROLL TIDE!

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