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Tide, get ready to ROLL!

H/T: Beth C

ROLL TIDE ROLL!

Quotes for Football Fans

My mother just sent me this one:

#1. ‘Football is only a game. Spiritual things are eternal. Nevertheless, Beat Texas ‘ - Seen on a church sign in Arkansas prior to the 1969 game.

#2. ‘After you retire, there’s only one big event left… and I ain’t ready for that.’ - Bobby Bowden / Florida State

#3. ‘The man who complains about the way the ball bounces is likely to be the one who dropped it.’ - Lou Holtz / Arkansas

#4. ‘When you win, nothing hurts.’ - Joe Namath / Alabama

#5. ‘Motivation is simple.. You eliminate those who are not motivated.’ - Lou Holtz / Arkansas

#6. ‘If you want to walk the heavenly streets of gold, you gotta know the password, ‘Roll, tide, roll!’ - Bear Bryant / Alabama

#7. ‘A school without football is in danger of deteriorating into a medieval study hall.’ - Frank Leahy / Notre Dame

#8. ‘There’s nothing that cleanses your soul like getting the hell kicked out of you.’ - Woody Hayes / Ohio State

#9. ‘I don’t expect to win enough games to be put on NCAA probation. I just want to win enough to warrant an investigation.’ - Bob Devaney / Nebraska

#10. ‘In Alabama , an atheist is someone who doesn’t believe in Bear Bryant.’ - Wally Butts / Georgia

#11. ‘You can learn more character on the two-yard line than anywhere else in life.’ - Paul Dietzel / LSU

#12. ‘It’s kind of hard to rally around a math class.’ - Bear Bryant / Alabama

#13. When asked if Fayetteville was the end of the world. ‘No, but you can see it from here.’ - Lou Holtz / Arkansas …

#14. ‘I make my practices real hard because if a player is a quitter, I want him to quit in practice, not in a game.’ - Bear Bryant / Alabama

#15. ‘There’s one sure way to stop us from scoring- give us the ball near the goal line.’ - Matty Bell / SMU

#16. ‘Lads, you’re not to miss practice unless your parents died or you died.’ - Frank Leahy / Notre Dame

#17. ‘I never graduated from Iowa , but I was only there for two terms - Truman’s and Eisenhower’s.’ - Alex Karras / Iowa

#18. ‘My advice to defensive players: Take the shortest route to the ball and arrive in a bad humor.’ -Bowden Wyatt / Tennessee

#19. ‘I could have been a Rhodes Scholar, except for my grades.’ - Duffy Daugherty / Michigan State

#20. ‘Always remember… Goliath was a 40 point favorite over David.’ - Shug Jordan / Auburn

#21. ‘They cut us up like boarding house pie. And that’s real small pieces’ - Darrell Royal / Texas

#22. ‘Show me a good and gracious loser, and I’ll show you a failure.’ - Knute Rockne / Notre Dame

#23. ‘They whipped us like a tied up goat.’ - Spike Dykes / Texas Tech

#24. ‘I asked Darrell Royal, the coach of the Texas Longhorns, why he didn’t recruit me and he said: ‘Well, Walt, we took a look at you and you weren’t any good.’ - Walt Garrison / Oklahoma State

#25. ‘Son, you’ve got a good engine, but your hands aren’t on the steering wheel.’ - Bobby Bowden / Florida State

#26. ‘Football is not a contact sport - it is a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport.’ - Duffy Daugherty / Michigan State

#27. After USC lost 51-0 to Notre Dame, his postgame message to his team: ‘All those who need showers, take them.’ - John McKay / USC

#28. ‘If lessons are learned in defeat, our team is getting a great education.’ - Murray Warmath / Minnesota

#29. ‘The only qualifications for a lineman are to be big and dumb. To be a back, you only have to be dumb.’ - Knute Rockne / Notre Dame

#30. ‘Oh, we played about like three tons of buzzard puke this afternoon.’ - Spike Dykes / Texas Tech

#31. ‘It isn’t necessary to see a good tackle. You can hear it.’ - Knute Rockne / Notre Dame

#32. ‘We live one day at a time and scratch where it itches.’ - Darrell Royal / Texas

#33. ‘We didn’t tackle well today but we made up for it by not blocking.’ - Wilson Matthews / Little Rock Central High School

#34. ‘Three things can happen when you throw the ball, and two of them are bad.’ - Darrell Royal / University of Texas

#35. ‘I’ve found that prayers work best when you have big players.’ - Knute Rockne / Notre Dame

#36. ‘Gentlemen, it is better to have died a small boy than to fumble this football.’ - John Heisman

Football and the South

In college I roomed with two girls who weren’t from the South. One was Canadian, the other from Michigan. Neither of them really understood the whole “football thing”. I joked with one, telling her that down here we don’t use DNA testing to determine paternity … we just ask the child which team he roots for!

Looking back, when I tried explaining the phenomena to them, maybe I really should’ve included some of the following:

Women’s Accessories:

NORTH: Chap Stick in back pocket and a $20 bill in the front pocket.

SOUTH: Louis Vuitton duffel with two lipsticks, waterproof mascara, and a fifth of bourbon. Money not necessary - that’s what dates are for.

Stadium Size:

NORTH: College football stadiums hold 20,000 people.

SOUTH: High school football stadiums hold 20,000 people.

Fathers:

NORTH: Expect their daughters to understand Sylvia Plath.

SOUTH: Expect their daughters to understand pass interference.

Campus Decor:

NORTH: Statues of founding fathers.

SOUTH: Statues of Heisman trophy winners.

Homecoming Queen:

NORTH: Also a physics major.

SOUTH: Also Miss America

Heroes:

NORTH: Rudy Giuliani

SOUTH: Archie & Peyton Manning

… and might I add: THE BEAR!

Getting Tickets:

NORTH: 5 days before the game you walk into the ticket office on campus.

SOUTH: 5 months before the game you walk into the ticket office on campus, make a large financial contribution and put name on a waiting list for tickets.

Friday Classes After a Thursday Night Game:

NORTH: Students and teachers not sure they’re going to the game, because they have classes on Friday.

SOUTH: Teachers cancel Friday classes because they don’t want to see the few hung over students that might actually make it to class.

Parking:

NORTH: An hour before game time, the University opens the campus for game parking.

SOUTH: RVs sporting their school flags begin arriving on Wednesday for the weekend festivities. The really faithful arrive on Tuesday.

Game Day:

NORTH: A few students party in the dorm and watch ESPN on TV.

SOUTH: Every student wakes up, has a beer for breakfast, and rushes over to where ESPN is broadcasting ‘Game Day Live’ to get on camera and wave to the idiots up north who wonder why ‘Game Day Live’ is never Broadcast from their campus.

Tailgating:

NORTH: Raw meat on a grill, beer with lime in it, listening to local radio station with truck tailgate down.

SOUTH: 30-foot custom pig-shaped smoker fires up at dawn. Cooking accompanied by live performance from the Dave Matthews Band,… who come over during breaks and ask for a hit off bottle of bourbon.

Getting to the Stadium:

NORTH: You ask ‘Where’s the stadium?’ When you find it, you walk right in.

SOUTH: When you’re near it, you’ll hear it. On game day it is the state’s third largest city.

Concessions:

NORTH: Drinks served in a paper cup, filled to the top with soda.

SOUTH: Drinks served in a plastic cup, with the home team’s mascot on it, filled less than half way with soda, to ensure enough room for bourbon.

When National Anthem is Played:

NORTH : Stands are less than half full, and less than half of them stand up.

SOUTH: 100,000 fans, all standing, sing along in perfect four-part harmony.

Commentary (Male):

NORTH: ‘Nice play.’

SOUTH: ‘Dammit, you slow sumbitch - tackle him and break his legs.’

Commentary (Female):

NORTH: ‘My, this certainly is a violent sport.’

SOUTH: ‘Dammit, you slow sumbitch - tackle him and break his legs.’

My personal favorite: “Put his ass in the grass!”

Announcers:

NORTH: Neutral and paid.

SOUTH: Announcer harmonizes with the crowd in the fight song, with a tear in his eye because he is so proud of his team.

After the Game:

NORTH: The stadium is empty way before the game ends.

SOUTH: Another rack of ribs goes on the smoker, while somebody goes to the nearest package store for more bourbon, and planning begins for next week’s game.

My God, I love the South! Can I get a ROLL TIDE?

25 years later, are we still looking for our Bear?

I knew the anniversary was coming up, but had forgotten about it until I read an excerpt on The Birmingham News’ blog asking readers to share their memories of Paul William “Bear” Bryant, Sr. Saturday is the 25th anniversary of the death of our beloved coaching legend. That day, I think the entire state mourned his passing. I remember Gramps saying, “Today, a good man and a great coach has died.” Ever since that day, I’ve heard fellow fans refer to him as “The Greatest Coach That Ever Lived.”

I was only 8 years old when he died, but I had heard stories about “The Bear” all of my life, and they’ve stayed with me. I was born an Alabamian, but I was a University of Alabama fan “but by the Grace of God.” Where I come from, he’s more than just a man, he was a legend. But I think most Alabama fans didn’t know how good we had it until it was over. In the 24 years that we had The Bear, Alabama had 232 wins and only 46 losses. His teams gave us 6 national championships — the most number celebrated by Southeastern Conference members and among the most of any school in the whole country!

With those kind of numbers, it’s no wonder many fans want to compare every coach that steps up to him. Why, I’ve heard my own husband gripe, saying that if fans would stop doing that, they could appreciate the coach they do have more. While I agree with that to an extent, but you know the truth is: we were spoiled. And I think now people are realizing that we’ve been missing that kind of quality coaching for a long time. I like what I hear about the guy we have now. I hear Saban’s very tough on the kids. Good, we need someone who can keep those boys in line and teach ‘em a thing or two. He’s no Bear, but if you ask me, he has a lot of the same qualities that make him just as good a coach — let’s hope he proves me right in the next few years.

Selective reading/viewing and link love

• The Birmingham News has put together a photo gallery of Bryant-related Birmingham News photos.
• My own collection of Bear Bryant pictures are here. (though Zooomr is currently in a move, so if they’re down please try again later!)
• There are a TON of Bear Bryant videos on YouTube.
• RedElephants’ Bear Bryant bio and timeline.
• Mike Puma’s “Bear Bryant ’simply the best there ever was’” for ESPN.
• Phillip Casteel’s And What “The Bear” Had To Say… page of Bear Bryant quotes and anecdotes.

I know there’s a LOT more out there, but those are what I keep bookmarked…

EDIT: Here’s a few more I’ve found along the way…

• Alabama jokes posted over at Wade Kwon’s blog
• Fox 6’s coverage of the anniversary
• The archived footage of Bear’s funeral

In closing

I’ve heard tons of Bear Bryant stories over the years, but there’s one in particular I have heard told by several people and it’s by far my favorite. I’d like to leave that here with you all, following my favorite clip of The Bear, giving one of his famous half-time speeches:

Bear Bryant knew how to be nice. At a TD Club meeting many years before his death, Coach told the following story … typical of the way he operated:

“I had just been named the new head coach at Alabama and was off in my old car down in South Alabama recruiting a prospect who was supposed to have been a pretty good player and I was havin’ trouble finding the place. Getting hungry I spied an old cinder block building with a small sign out front that simply said “Restaurant”.

“I pull up, go in and every head in the place turns to stare at me. Seems I’m the only white fella in the place. But the food smelled good so I skip a table and go up to a cement bar and sit. A big ole man in a tee shirt and cap comes over and says, “What do you need?” I told him I needed lunch and what did they have today? He says, “You probably won’t like it here, today we’re having chiltlins, collard greens and black eyed peas with cornbread. I’ll bet you don’t even know what chitlins are, do you?”

“I looked him square in the eye and said, “I’m from Arkansas, I’ve probably eaten a mile of them. Sounds like I’m in the right place.” They all smiled he left to serve me up a big plate. When he comes back he says, “you ain’t from around here then?” And I explain I’m the new football coach up in Tuscaloosa at the University and I’m here to find what ever that boy’s name was, and he says, “yeah I’ve heard of him, he’s supposed to be pretty good.” And he gives me directions to the school so I can meet him and his coach.

“As I’m paying up to leave I remember my manners and leave a tip, not too big to be flashy, but a good one, and he told me lunch was on him, but I told him for a lunch that good, I felt I should pay. The big man asked me if I had a photograph of something he could hang up to show I’d been there. I was so new that I didn’t have any yet. It really wasn’t that big a thing back then to be asked for, but I took a napkin and wrote his name and address on it and told him I’d get him one. I met the kid I was lookin’ for later that afternoon, and I don’t remember his name, but do remember I didn’t think much of him when I met him. I had wasted a day, or so I thought.

“When I got back to Tuscaloosa late that night, I put that napkin from my shirt pocket and put it under my keys so I wouldn’t forget it. Hell, back then I was excited that anybody would want a picture of me. And the next day we found a picture and I wrote on it, “Thanks for the best lunch I’ve ever had, Paul ‘Bear’ Bryant.”

“Now let’s go a whole buncha years down the road. Now we have black players at Alabama and I’m back down in that part of the country scouting an offensive lineman we sure needed. Y’all remember, (and I forget the name, but it’s not important to the story), well anyway, he’s got two friends going to Auburn and he tells me he’s got his heart set on Auburn too, so I leave empty handed and go on see some others while I’m down there. Two days later, I’m in my office in Tuscaloosa and the phone rings and it’s this kid who just turned me down, and he says, “Coach, do you still want me at Alabama?” And I said hell yes I sure do. And he says, OK, he’ll come. And I say, “well son, what changed your mind?” And he said, “When my grandpa found out that I had a chance to play for you and said no he pitched a fit and told me I wasn’t going nowhere but Alabama, and wasn’t playing for nobody but you. He thinks a lot of you and has ever since y’all met.” Well I didn’t know his grandad from Adam’s housecat so I asked him who his grand daddy was and he said, “You probably don’t remember him, but you ate in his restaurant your first year at Alabama and you sent him a picture that he’s had hung in that place ever since. That picture’s his pride and joy and he still tells everybody about the day that Bear Bryant came in and had chitlins with him. My grandpa said that when you left there, he never expected you to remember him or to send him that picture, but you kept your word to him, and to Grandpa, that’s everything. He said you could teach me more than football and I had to play for a man like you, so I guess I’m going to.”

“I was floored”, he said. “But I learned that the lessons my mama taught me were always right. It don’t cost nuthin’ to be nice. It don’t cost nuthin’ to do the right thing most of the time, and it costs a lot to lose your good name by breakin’ your word to someone. When I went back to sign that boy, I looked up his Grandpa and he’s still running that place, but it looks a lot better now, and he didn’t have chitlins that day, but he had some ribs that woulda made Dreamland proud and I made sure I posed for a lot of pictures, and don’t think I didn’t leave some new ones for him too, along with a signed football. I made it clear to all my assistants to keep this story and these lessons in mind when they’re out on the road. And if you remember anything else from me, remember this, “It really doesn’t cost anything to be nice, and the rewards can be unimaginable.”

“Go Vote!” so sayeth The Bear

I had been meaning to post this and kept forgetting until I saw it posted at The Terminal. ESPN is polling the masses asking who is the Greatest College Football Coach of all time. Bear may not have thought of himself as such, but I sure as hell do. :mrgreen:

If you feel the same, please meander over to ESPN’s site and cast your vote!

A treat for you ‘Bama fans

My mother was able to get copies of these pictures from a lady she works with. My brother was kind enough to allow access to his online photo site so I could see and snag them.

These are photos of Coach Bear Bryant at Legion Field. The opponent is LSU — if you look closely, you can see a few fans in the background wearing the tell-tale purple and gold. There’s also one shot with the LSU tiger mascot next to Bear. The exact date is unknown, but if I had to guess it’s in the late 70’s, most probably 1978 (Alabama played LSU at Legion field that year). Unfortunately there is only one shot with any players in the picture, and I am unable to make out their names. I also have not yet found a roster for the 1978-79 year so until I get some additional information, I’m just guessing here.

Anyways, I figured many of you would get a kick out of these. I’ve just now finished uploading the images and if the set doesn’t display correctly, give it a minute or two and try the link again:

(Click the image to access the Zooomr Photo Set)